Thanksgiving, Black Friday, and Decorating for Christmas

That's what my time off from work has consumed. Wednesday I spent the day cleaning the house and getting ready for thanksgiving. Thanksgiving Day i had dinner at my house. And it was awesome. My turkey was great! Stuffing was awesome! And noone fought! woohoo!! I even got a 2 hour rest/nap/tv relaxation in before we had to leave for my mother in laws for dinner. Yes we still have to do 2 dinners every holiday but having one at my house makes it much easier on us. We only have to leave the house once, not twice.

Friday morning mom and I headed out Black Friday shopping. We didn't leave my house until 7:30 and got to the mall about 8:30 and it wasn't packed. I was shocked. This is the 6th year we've done this and I was amazed. We got a close parking spot, there were plenty open. Walked in and barely waiting in line. Got all our door busters we wanted. Went to lunch around 12:00 and walked right in to a table at Max and Ermas. Even Target and Kohls were manageable. Normally we don't get home until 6-7 pm and we were home by 4! It was an awesome day.

Well...almost awesome. Princess Daisy got into a fight with some animal at the farm and her ear got cut. Ear cuts on dogs are like head wounds on people. They bleed and bleed and bleed. Just when we thought it wasn't bleeding, she'd shake her head and voila more blood. Right now her head is gauzed and taped to she doesn't get blood everywhere. Going to be a LONG winter with her I have a feeling!!!

Today I have been puttering around decorating for xmas. I have a bunch of stuff on a list to get at Michaels tonight to finish up. Pictures to follow! :)

Thanksgiving Week

Seems crazy that Thanksgiving is this week. I can't believe how fast 2011 has zoomed by us. Probably a good thing considering all the shitty stuff we've gone though. 2012 WILL be better, it HAS to be.

I have started my Thanksgiving food list. This year we are having lunch here and then dinner at my mother in laws. She doesn't want to be in the same room with my father in law so she does her own dinner. We are having the basics, turkey, stuffing, mashed taters, butternut squash, cooked carrots, pie, and cranberry sauce. We'll also be having Birthday Cake since my brother is 37 TODAY and we'll be having his birthday cake with Thanksgiving. He is getting to be an old man. Seems like just yesterday we were fighting like crazy in our teens and now he's a dad. Doesn't seem like we can be this old!!! :)

The day after the big negative news

Today was much better than yesterday, I only cried ONCE! I told my dad and my brother both and didn't even tear up. I am still a little bitter over the whole deal, but it's more that we have to go through it, not that it didn't work. All these pieces of trash have tons of kids, don't take care of them, the state pays for them, and they can get knocked up like it's nothing. The people that CAN AFFORD a child and REALLY WANT ONE, have to pay for one. Where's the justice in that? The state of PA is one of many that doesn't require ins. companies to pay any amount of fertility treatments, but yet will pay for people on welfare to have 3 kids and pay for them for 18 years of their life. UGH!!!!

The good news is - The next chapter - 2012! My dr. is awesome too. He personally called us last night at 7 pm to express his sincerity in that it didn't work and hopes that we will not give up hope. UH Cleveland really is a wonderful place!!!! I recommend it to anyone that is going through this process or has to go through something similar.

My main goal in the next month is to enjoy the holidays, relax, exercise, and enjoy being "hormone free" for a while. And then we can start full force after the first of the year. Hopefully by this time next year I'm typing to you all on my laptop with a baby sleeping in my lap!

Negative

:( Just doesn't seem fair!!

Thankfully I have an awesome wonderful husband, a great family, and some kick ass friends to help me through this.

Well Crammit!

I'm spotting. Not cool. I have my first blood pg test on thursday morning. But I can pretty much tell by the spotting, this cycle didn't work. I'm not entirely devastated, but I'm pretty upset. So upset that I left work at 2:00 pm today. And I'm never that way. I've worked through alot without getting upset. I find myself to be a pretty strong woman. But this...just kicked me right in the gut! I know this happens to 30% of women that end up pregnant, but i can tell by the way my body feels, it's not going to happen this time.

But I still have to wait until thursday for the big "blood test" to confirm what I already know. Which really really sucks!!! 3 more nights of shots in the ass for nothing. DH said that if it ends up positive on thursday he's going to kick my ass. I highly doubt that. I know I seem to be a little negative, but after everything we have gone though, this just seems like one more dart on our dart board.

Trying to think good thoughts....but it's hard!

6 Totsicles!

Yes I said totsicles. lol. We were able to have 6 of our embryos frozen for possible use later down the road. I am very happy with this. If our first fresh cycle fails, we have the option now of trying another fresh cycle, or trying to transfer one of our frozen ones. Frozen transfer is alot cheaper than the fresh cycle. That's probably a leading deciding factor if this one doesn't work.

So far I am 5 days past transfer and can't test for another WEEK. I've done ok this past 5 days but this is going to take alot of strength to get by until next week when I can test and see if this baby stuck!!!

Dustin's been wonderful but a little too overprotective. He thinks that if I move too much the embryo might fall out. Yeah that's not going to happen. Atleast I hope not! :)

Boring Sunday

I am supposed to rest all day today and yesterday and I am bored out of my mind. I have watched about 3 movies and tried to read but nothing is keeping my interest. I know it's for a good cause but holy crap, what I wouldn't do to be able to go to the store!!! lol.

I haven't had a whole lot of symptoms over this whole time frame, except tiredness and today out of the blue I got extremely nauseous. My friend tells me it's my body preparing myself for when i do get pregnant. The worst part is the shots in the butt Dustin has to give me. They are a pain and they hurt if you don't heat them for a decent amount of time afterwards. And with Dustin harvesting corn at the farm all day and night, he's had to run home at 9:30 every night to "shoot me in the butt"

Seed has been Planted

Now Grow Baby Grow!

We had our embryo transfer this morning and it went very well. The Dr's told us our embryo was BEAUTIFUL. It was a very interesting experience, but i have nothing but great things to say about the UH Macdonald Facility in Cleveland, OH. They are a wonderful facility and have some great people that work with them. Everyone makes you feel very hopeful that this really could work. We decided to only have one embryo transferred. My dr is very against multiple births as they can cause many problems for the mother and children. We have trust in our Dr. so we went with his suggestions.

Now it's a waiting game. I have to rest all weekend, blech!!! I don't do well resting when I feel fine. But it's for a good cause!!! Then after this weekend I have to wait until the 17th for my first blood test. The only thing now is to not go crazy and think "stick baby stick" thoughts!

Retreival Done...Next stop Transfer

Well I made it through all the meds and through Retrevial. We did the retrevial on Monday. It went very well. Only minimal pain and i slept all afternoon & evening on monday. They called and told me of the 14 mature eggs, 12 of them fertilized. As of today all 12 had divided and were growing. We are having a 5 day transfer on Saturday and transferring one egg. I know that's a gamble, but with my history of twins in both families, we run the high risk of triplets if we transfer 2 and i'm just not willing to go that route. Plus with me only being 31 years old, they feel that one good one is as good as 2 good ones. The % on a 5 day transfer from 2 to 1 is only a 5% difference. I'm willing to try it with one. Hopefully we have a few to freeze too so that we have something in the future without having to go through it again.

Finally Something I have looks Good! lol

I had my first U/S for my IVF process to see if everything was a go. I had to be at the dr. office at 8 am which is an hour drive from my house. Then after the U/S go to the lab for bloodwork. I didn't get to work until almost 11 a.m. But I have a system now, so when I go tomorrow I know how to get into the lab quicker rather than waiting for 45 mins.

The worst part is waiting for the clinic to call you in the afternoon to tell you it's a go or somethings wrong. I was really worried something was wrong, because I started AF that morning and had some serious pain on the side where everything is tangled up. She called around 1:30 though and told me that everything looked wonderful. It looked good enough they were going to lower my levels of stims to proceed with caution so I'm not overstimulated. That made me feel alot better. To actually hear that everything looks wonderful was a sigh of relief. I haven't had anything "look" wonderful since this process started almost a year ago. We've always been told what they figured they'd find, or how they expected it to work out, and nothing was as planned. To have something as planned was awesome!!!

Stims started Friday night, the only major thing is I have this crazy headache that won't go away. But I'm plugging through it, nothing major, nothing Migraine like so I can handle it. I go again tomorrow for a monitoring appointment. If everything goes as planned my ER is Nov 1st and ET will be Nov 5th. Which means by Thanksgiving we should know if it worked or not! :)

1 Week Down

And so far so good! The only major side effects are tiredness which my friends just tell me is preparing me for if i do get pregnant and the pregnancy fatigue that goes along with it. I've been drinking about 80 oz of water a day which i think has helped with any possible headaches. So far so good. I know the worse part comes next friday with the stims but so far I'm doing ok!

Day 1

Is here! EEEEK!!!!! I'm so nervous I might have to poo! lol. I don't know why, I've done other "hormone altering" drugs before and am used to feeling crazy, hot flashes, etc. Granted those were in the middle of January when it was 10 below zero out! It just means it's here. And I think that scares me! But I'm ready. I almost wish we had schedule it early so i didn't have time think about it. I'm such a scaredy cat.

On a non-infertile topic, Jill's wedding was yesterday and it couldn't have gone any better. It was 75 degrees and sunny, for Oct 8th, that is UNHEARD of in NW PA! She looked great! Everyone had a wonderful time. Best Wishes for her and Rick and happily ever after!

Now I'm off to read for a little while to keep my mind off of my shots tonight at 9 pm!

One More Week...

One week from tonight I start my first injection on this crazy rollercoaster ride of IVF. I have to admit, I had a minor mental breakdown in the parking lot of walgreen's on Thursday night when I picked up my medication. It was VERY overwhelming. I was pretty sure I couldn't do it. But I sucked it up (along with a small milkshake), shook off the uncertainty and moved on my way. Can't go back now, we've come way too far. It's just very intimidating. I know I can do it, I just doubt myself at times.

Scheduled!!!

That's right, my IVF is scheduled. I will start my injections of Lupron on Oct 9, 2011. My stims will start on Oct 21st, with my baseline u/s scheduled for that day. My tentative ER is Nov 1st with transfer on the 5th. I should know by turkey day if I'm PG from this cycle or not.

I am trying to not get overly excited. I realize this is a process and sometimes doesn't always happen on the first shot. It's kind of like playing the lottery with one other person. It's a 50-50 chance you'll win. Kind of scary.

I feel kind of robbed. Robbed of the joy of an 'unexpected' positive pregnancy test. Robbed of the excitement of trying to conceive and it just 'happening.' Has it made me bitter? At times, yes it has. There are times when I just want to scream WHY ME, WHAT DID I DO TO CAUSE THIS? But then I remember there are worse things that could happen, I have my health (for the most part), a great family, wonderful husband, and the best friends a girl could ask for. I am a very lucky person. But sometimes, it gets the best of me and I just want to shout What The F*@$ from the rooftops sometimes!

DH has told me all summer long to just suck it up, lose the bitterness, etc. Then we went for our IVF consolation and the reality finally hit him. This is the ONLY way we can conceive is with medical science. We have become stronger because of it, but we still bicker here and there like every couple under stress does! We wouldn't be us without the little bickering here and there! :)

Another Baby

My friend Amanda had her second child yesterday and i had the pleasure again to be in the c-section room with her. Her family lost her sister during child birth about 3 years ago so she's asked me each time. It's awesome to be able to experience the birth of a child. It's kind of bittersweet though knowing that we haven't made it to that moment yet ourselves, however she is my best friend and I am very happy for her.

Little Miss MacKenzie Mae was born on 8/11 at 9:11 a.m. and is doing wonderful. Her big sister Amie Sue is so happy to be a big sister, even if she is only 19 months old! :) Welcome MacKenzie, you have a wonderful lovable family!!!

31

No not the party, that's my actual age since Thursday. It wasn't near as hard as 30 was. I have come to the realization that things don't happen by a certain time or an age, they happen when they happen.

My birthday was wonderful. Momma brought a cake to work, everyone loves my mom's cakes. They are wonderful! The cake and the sugary frosting! DH sent flowers and took me to a wonderful dinner! Next week at the beach I get to pick out a new purse at the Coach store! :) Very exciting!!!!!! Our dinner was up on the lake and even though it was 100 degrees it was a very tasty dinner.

Things to accomplish by next year...become more proactive rather than reactive! :)

Total Reality Check

We went to Cleveland last week to the fertility dr. to discuss our options. We know there is really only one option, bring on the science baby!!!! Luckily my broken pipes are the only thing that preventing us from a real pregnancy. I ovulate great eggs every month and dh's sperm is FABULOUS! So I guess we have a better chance in this lottery than others I know. The clinic itself was awesome. They are professional, yet compassionate. We could've started THIS WEEK. How crazy is it that I have waited 2 years for this moment and I'm like...uh I need just ONE MORE WEEK!!! :) Crazy Crazy!!!

We are scheduled to go on Vacation in 2 weeks, so our plan is to enjoy it, then when we come back sit down and hash out the details and set a schedule up. I have to mentally psych myself up for 37+ days of injections. YEEHAW!!!! Bring on the BITCH! :)

A Raise...yet one I have to work for! Literally!

So after making it very clear to the bosses son on Friday I was no impressed with the high amount of $$ we are paying new people, I was called in yesterday and informed I was getting a pay raise because they appreciate my time that i have put in and my dedication to the company. I also made it clear to my boss that I may have a time in the future where I will need to come in late every other day for a few weeks to have bloodwork and u/s done. And that I appreciate what they have done, however, I understand if they want to move me to hourly and I will take those hours without pay. He told me that the company will pay me no matter how many hours I need to take off during that period and thanked me for being upfront with him over this situation and I still get my raise.

I seriously think they want me to work for my raise. Today I found out at 4:30 that I had to have a presentation ready for my boss by 8 a.m. tomorrow. So here I sit at home working on a presentation so I can get it emailed by 10 p.m. tonight. Yeehaw!!!!

Go Big or Go Home

I swear that's my husband's philosophy in life. I wanted a real swimming pool this year and I got enough in my annual bonus to buy one. We are big on not aquiring debt for a hobby or entertainment purposes. Well I wanted a 21' or an 18' and he ordered the 24' round pool. 15,000 gallons of pure summer entertainment. He surprised me tuesday when I was golfing and had it installed so it's installed and completely full and it's FREAKING HUGE!!!! I swear I may need to telephathically connect to the person on the other side of it. I am calling it the big white elephant of the back yard. lol.

It's a good thing we paid to have it installed because although we love each other very much, construction projects are not our strong suit together. Last night we put the ladder together and in the pool, it took us 2 HOURS to install just the ladder. And patience was very thin by that time! Now I just need the sunshine to enjoy it. Come ON SUNSHINE!!! :)

Post-Op Appt.

I had my post-op appointment on Monday after my surgery. I had a feeling I knew what they were going to tell me but I had never let on to anyone. I have endometriosis and I have 2 blocked tubes that are unable to be unblocked. I have a 5% chance of conceiving without medical assistance. The dr. bascially said that you can do what you want and wait but you wouldn't quit your job today, planning on winning the lottery tonight.

So I have an appointment with an RE in Cleveland on July 14th to see what my options are and what the costs will be. We know it will be costly but we are willing to see what it's all about.

There are a few people at work that know what we are planning on doing. Most people are very understanding. I don't want alot of people to know because I don't want to be "that" person. The one that people feel sorry for. And frankly I don't want to hear everyone's opinion. I had one coworker the other day tell me that what I am looking into is "unethical." Well there are a lot worse things I could be doing than this!!! Unethical?? Kiss my big butt!!!

Nervous

Tomorrow I get the results of my sonogram I had last week and I'm a little nervous. So nervous I took the whole day off work because I didn't really want to go back if i get bad news. I just keep fearing the worst and I don't know why. Last night I had a minor breakdown around 2 am. Thankfully he was sleeping and didn't hear me. I just don't get it. I don't get why it's me. One in 100 people, and I'm the 1! Go figure!

Good news though...dustin had his septoplasty and polyp removal yesterday and is doing really good. He took today off work because I made him but I think he's glad he did. He was bored all day but he rested which he needed. Now all he wants to do is pick his big boogers and I won't let him!!! lol.

Another Dr. Visit, Another Test

Well I was supposed to go to the Dr. next friday for a sonogram and for an appointment after the sonogram to find out what is going on with my crazy woman parts. But...I was 6 days early yesterday, so in order to find out what's going on they want to do my sonogram during my period. But unfortunately they couldn't reschedule my dr. appointment for the same day. So my sono is tomorrow and my dr. appointment is next friday. Wouldn't be so bad if it didn't take a 1/2 day to go there, and drive back to work. So I miss 1/2 day of work both days. But if they find out what's wrong, I'm thrilled. I can't handle the digging pains anymore on my left side. And 6 days early, WTF!!!! Nothing like being unprepared on khaki day! UGH!!!!

Spring has Sprung if only for a few days...

Spring is finally here, It's gorgeous out today! I know it won't last but I'll enjoy it while it's here. 60's in Pennsylvania in March is almost unheard of. This week is FINALLY over. Let the weekend begin!!!!! The past couple weeks have been extremely busy at work, it seems the more people we hire, the dumber they are. I'm not being harsh, I'm being serious. I have never seen a more lazy group of people who think they should only have to work 4 hours in an 8 hour day and goof off the other 4 hours. Hopefully it will get better soon. It has to, right????

This weekend I have a baby shower. I'm not real enthused about going, but then again, why would I be. I will go, paint on a happy face, and then come home and eat a donut! haha! Food lately has been my friend, and my ever expanding waist shows it. It's hard to combat this problem and not get upset and stressed about it. 2 years is an extremely long time, and especially since every single person I know seems to be pregnant. I feel like people are always feeling sorry for me, like they KNOW what's going on, even though those that know are few and far between. My goal for next week is to get to the gym 3 times next week. Maybe that will help me cope with this. I doubt it but it's worth a try!

I fought the deer, and the deer won!

Well after 4 years of living here in the middle of nowhere, I hit a stupid deer. I hit it this morning on my way to work. I didn't even see him, he just leaped over the guard rail and right into my car. I was just eating my breakfast and THUD. I actually said out loud "SON OF A B!TCH!" Then I kind of had to laugh. Of course that's my way of getting through things lately. Just laugh, it's harder to get mad or cry that way. I didn't think it was that bad, until I got to work. Yup, he got both doors, the fender, the bumper and the headlight casing. This is going to be costly, thankfully i have GREAT insurance!!! This was honestly my first claim ever since I started driving 14 years ago, so I am very lucky. Someone asked at work how I could just laugh. Well...easy, it's a car. A material possession. Yes, it's my way to get to work and yes it's a newer car, but it's just a car. The most important things in live, aren't things at all!

Spring Cleaning

It's that time again to spring clean. Unfortunately since we put the new floors in, we haven't gotten all the boxes unpacked so I guess that's going to be part of the spring cleaning this year. I love my house, I do, but we are seriously lacking some kitchen space. I think I may head to home depot to check out premade pantrys to see if I can get one to fit in our kitchen. At this point we are not going to redo the kitchen anytime soon and i need more storage space.

I finally told my dad about our issues. He didn't have a clue. I only let him know because i know it's gotta be running around in his head why we haven't had one yet since we've been married almost 4 years. He just asked what they are doing. I explained what they are going to do now and what they may do in the future. The last resort is $15,000 for only a 60% chance. So that one I said we probably wouldn't go with due to the cost of it, or it would be a VERY last resort and a one time shot.

3 Weeks Until Christmas

How did it get to be December already. The tree is up, the lights are on, and the gifts are almost 1/2 bought. Seems like it was just September and we were selling pumpkins.

Last night we went to Wing City Grille for dinner in Lakewood, it's newly opened and we thought we'd give it a try. The place is very nice, but the food was just ehhh ok. Plus you can tell when you are getting old. They were setting up for karaoke night and we were in front of the speaker. We kept complaining to each other that it was too loud. I have officially become my parents. When the heck did that happen!!!

This week has been crazy busy at work. We had flooding one day and then snow on the thruways in NY state the other day. We actually had 2 drivers stuck on the thruway for 24 hours! That's just crazy. It's weeks like this that make me wish I had chosen a different profession when I was choosing my major all those years ago Sophomore year at Pitt. But it is what it is. Hopefully this week will be less challenging. Don't get me wrong I am all about a good challenge but I'm afraid I may not have much hair left by the end of the year. lol.

Garden Varieties

The best part about August is the Gardens are in full bloom. This year has been so hot and humid we have had a bumper crop garden. We have some cucumbers that are almost 2 feet long. They are huge!!! And the pumpkins, OMG the pumpkins. We will probably have over 400 when it's all said and done. I am going sometime in the next few weeks get some paints out and make signs to sell the pumpkins this fall. I figure I better get the signs all made and ready because once the pumpkins are ready they are going to need to get sold!!!

I finally bought a new digital camera last night. I'm so cheap! I have been wanting a new one since I dropped my old one back in November but it finally stopped working in March. I was afraid I'd buy the wrong one but I realized I'm not a professional photographer so mediocre pictures are ok with me. As long as I have pictures.

August Laziness

I can't believe it's the middle of august already. The summer has flown by!!! It's this time of year when the humidity is high and the energy level is VERY LOW!!! I have no desire to do anything most nights after work. I guess this is the lazy days of summer they talk about. Soon there will be leaves on the ground and cool crisp mornings. What I wouldn't do to be able to sleep without the A/C running all night long. I am definately and hoodie and jeans kind of person.

Week 1

Well after week 1 on weight watchers I am down 2 lbs. and actually have more energy. I've dieted before but never really on weight watchers. I'm used to not being able to eat this or that, and now I can within reason. It seems easier when you are counting points rather than adding calories. I know it's the same concept but it just seems easier. I love that you can earn more points by doing things and working out. I love that!!! Spinning class alone I earn 6 points and didn't even use them last week.

There is much drama with my brother and his girlfriend again. I'm not sure if I feel like Dr. Phil or Jerry Springer. He needs to cut his losses and get rid of her. I know he is keeping it going becuase of his son, but he'll still see his son. He just needs to go talk to someone and get rid of her. She's a lazy piece of crap! I can't imagine living with someone who pays for my car, my insurance all the food for me and my kids (one is not even his), pays the mortgage and bills and yet she complains he doesn't help with daycare. FOR REAL??? What a bitch!

Another weekend gone. Got alot done around the house today and the bathroom is coming along nicely. Hopefully we'll be tiling next weekend!!! :)

Broken Promises

This time it's not with any one person it seems to be with work. I went to them back in December and told them enough is enough. I was looking for another job. I feel overworked for no reason. There are people at work that do NOTHING and keep their jobs. I work non-stop from the minute I walk in until the minute I leave, putting in well over 40 hours a week and for what? Nothing. Oh well. I had an employee leave 2 weeks ago and she put not just a 2 week notice but a 9 MONTH NOTICE. and did they hire anyone, nope. we just hired someone for her job. So now I have the next 6 months to train this individual on top of everything else. It's just nuts. Unfortunately I was raised to care about my work that I put out. I can't just be a slacker. I've tried, it eats me up inside. Dammit mom and dad! haha!

On the bright side my living room is ALMOST DONE! WOOHOO!!! It's been a year in the making. The bathroom....ehhh we'll see about that. I'm going this afternoon to look at flooring for it and tile for the walls. So hopefully we can narrow that down to be ready to put in. Right now we are waiting on our window. Probably another week or so before that will be in.

Started a food journal this week. It will be interesting. I've never kept a journal before but it's a start to see what I actually eat and get it under control. We got a new vending machine at work. I worked there a year before I ever touched it. With the stress lately I've been there almost DAILY. not good!!!! I am going to the produce market tomorrow to get produce to get me through the week. Hopefully and stay way from the vending machine.

Valentine's Day

Valentine's day on Daytona 500 sunday. So not cool! Oh well, not like he did anything anyways.

I'm thinking this bathroom renovation is more than we ever should have taken on. I am beginning to think I will always have a 1 bathroom house. Oh well, that's ok. I've been sick most of the week with a head cold. Seems my whole family has, the little one's, Toby, Katie, and now my mom. Craziness I tell you. This cold season has been HORRIBLE.

Another month with a BFN. OH well, we'll try again next month. After 7 months it's getting kind of depressing. But I guess that's normal for some people.

I need to get back to the gym this week. I haven't been there since I got sick the first time back in January. With work being crazy, yes I had another 50 hour work week last week, and being sick and being tired all the time, there just wasn't the motivation. However after trying on jeans today, I have new motivation. I didn't buy anything tempting at the grocery store today, just my normal healthy lunch/dinner foods. I passed up everything tasty. Except Oreos but those are for Dustin. They are his breakfast. Wish I had his metabolism.

Well I'm ending this depressing winter post. Hopefully next post will be a little more cheerful!

February already!

Wow hard to believe it's February already. Seems like January just slipped away.

Yesterday one of my best employees took an early retirement. It was very sad. As much as she kind of drove me crazy at times, she was the MOST reliable employee I had. It kind of irritates me that we knew she was retiring for 9 months and they just started interviewing for her position yesterday. But oh well. That's the way we work I guess. Hopefully I will find someone soon who can take her position and take me off Saturday work!

Our bathroom is completely gutted down to the studs right now. The new subfloor is in, bathtub is purchased, I have to get the tile, and Dustin's getting drywall today. Hopefully by March we'll be well on our way. Dustin has a friend from work helping us at night during the week. He's a good kid and a good worker. We feed him dinner and pay him $20 here and there and he's happy. So we are happy! I can't wait to have a bathtub I can actually take a bath in!!! It will be SOO nice!!!

New baby and a week of sick!

Wow it's been a while. Alot has happened since the last post. January 6th I did one of the coolest things in my life. I was asked by my best friend to be in the room with her during her C-section. Her husband doesn't do well with hospitals and other issues that most of her family were just not comfortable. I was so honored to be asked to do it. It was the most awesome thing I've ever done. I was the first one who got to hold baby Amie and show her to her new mommy. She looks alot like her momma and her aunt who she's named after. I could never ever fill the shoes Amanda's sister left behind, but I hope that I gave her some comfort along the way. I know Jamie was up there in heaven looking down very proud of her baby sister!

Then a week later I ended up sick. Strep throat with the onset of scarlet fever. Who the hell gets scarlet fever anymore!!! I was off work 4 days, and spent 6 whole days on the couch. After oral and injected antibiotics, prednisone, and a mono test, i am back to normal. With the exception of the after effects of the prednisone. Thank god I only have about 2 more days of those to take. They are horrid. Nothing tastes good, I'm bloated and puffy. EGADS!!!!

Snow Snow and more Snow

After a fairly mild November and December, winter is actually here. It's been snowing since yesterday afternoon and really hasnt' stopped. The roads are horrid! Dustin and his brother went out on the snowmobiles tonight, I stayed home. It's 10 degrees out, and blowing winds of 40 miles per hour. Yeah, my nice warm house and a good movie was all I really wanted today after work.

The holidays are officially over. Took the tree down today, threw out the stale cookies, put all the gifts away we had received, and filled a garbage bag of boxes, etc. to burn. I do love the holidays but I am glad to get the house and my work back to normal. Settle into winter and comfort foods.

Starting back to Weight Watchers on Monday. I waited until Monday just to have the weekend to plan my grocery list and the meals. I really haven't had anything horrible for me today and stayed close to my points range. So I could probably say I started officially today. I'm not a meeting girl, I'm an online girl. I just find it easier that way. Hoping to get a few lunch breaks in at the Y this week, we'll see how work goes though. I'm not looking to lose 40 lbs or anything, just looking to have a little bit better fitting pants and if I drop some lbs along the way, even better!!!!

2010

Well it's January 1st, 2010. I can't believe I'm this old already. Where has the decade gone. It seems like just yesterday we rang in the new year at a friends house and wondered if the power would go out because of it being the millenium. Since then I have graduated college, lived with my brother for a few years, started a restaurant (that is now out of business), had 3 different jobs and found one I am really good at, met my husband and got married, and bought a house, lost a great friend, dealt with family cancer, had to take care of my parents instead of them taking care of me, flew for the first time (and 5 more times since then), drove from PA to FL with just a map from mapquest, and became a real adult.

I'll be 30 this year. That's monumental in itself. 30 - I can't believe that! It's not depressing (yet!) but it's just like wow!!!!

All in all, the past 10 years have been pretty good. Some downfalls here and there, but who doesn't have those. Dustin and I have a great relationship partially because we have been through more than most couples go through in their entire lives. They say "what doesn't kill you makes you stronger" and I feel that is very true.

What do I hope to accomplish in the next 10 years? Not as much as the past 10 years. I hope to become a mom and be a great one, be a better friend, and find a career that I am not just good at but at least like. No much right? haha!!!

Well here's to the newest decade and 2010! Let's make the most of it!

2009 Rewind

Well it's been a while...last entry was Labor Day. haha! I must be a holiday blogger (that missed a few in between).

2009 will be gone in about 3 hours. What has happened this year?

*We have had our first year in our new house. It's been alot of work and there's alot more to go but we've made some serious improvements in one year. (

• Kitchen wallpaper gone and painted
• Living room wallpaper gone, walls fixed, and painted
• Bathroom #2 gutted and ready for 1st project of 2010
• Hallway paneling painted
• Mudroom paneling painted
• Trees removed outside and landscaping redone
• Old Trailer/Shed tore down out back
• New furnace, woodstove, washer, dryer, and dishwasher

*The economy of 2009 has not been one of the best years, however we are both still employed in an industry that is here today gone tomorrow with small companies. For that we are both grateful.

*My new little newphew was born in September, he is the best little guy in the world.

*My parents are finally able to be in the same room together since the divorce 10 years ago. They don't necessarily talk to each other, but they can be in the same room. SUCH a relief!

*This year has been the year of babies, everyone we know it seems has a new baby. Maybe 2010 will be our year. We'll see!!!

2009 has been the year for many celebrity deaths, the inaugaration in one of the most historical presidential elections, the economy from hell, and the weirdest weather ever (hello texas had a white christmas but PA didn't?). Here's to a new decade and a great new year!!

The labor day weekend purge!

This weekend I am working on throwing out and cleaning out alot of our stuff. We closed so quickly on our house that we moved alot of stuff that we don't use/don't need. Stuff I really would have rather purged before we moved, but alas we moved it into our new house. I honestly do not know where all this stuff was in our old house. We went from 900 to 1600 sq. ft. and we have clutter here! I dont' get it.

Today I am working on the desks. Why do i have a USB cable for my first digital camera i got probably 6 years ago? And is it necessary I still have my utility bills from when my brother lived with me? Probably not.

Tomorrow hopefully I can force myself to get rid of clothes I dearly love but know that I will NEVER fit into again. We'll see how well THAT goes! :)

We have finally moved into the year 2009.

Dustin bought me a Wii for my birthday. We are officially people of 2009! lol. We've always talked about buying one, even had it in our cart at walmart a few times and put it back. So he decided for my birthday since my only wish was not having to cook that night. :) We also have the fit and guitar hero world tour. I know it's alot but my anniversary is next week so it's kind of a dual present thing. We are normally not game system people, but this I think we will use. Atleast the fit I think I will. I'll be nice to get up in the morning and do 10-20 mins of stuff on that and then head to the gym on my lunch break for my cardio and spinning sessions. We'll see. Hopefully we use it!!!

Golf Sundays

Sundays are our "golf nights" We took up golfing last summer and suprisingly we enjoy it. So much that I joined a league this summer on Tuesday nights with a bunch of women. Am I good? I'm ok. Which is suprising, I've never been good at any sports like function. I was always the last one picked for everything. But I'm not half bad for only doing this a year. Dustin is starting to enjoy it too.

Tonight we didn't really go golfing, we went to the driving range with Devon and Becky. We had a good time just hitting balls around and laughing at each other. It's times like this I am glad Dustin has the relationship with his Brother that he does. It's a good thing!

Our sunday nights in the summer is probably my favorite time of summer. It's "us" time but us having fun too!!!

Summer or Fall?

It's June 28th and I sit here in my hoodie with capri pants and my toes are FROZEN! This weather is too freaking weird. It was 80's and humid all last week with 60's this week and rain. WTF is all I have to say!

This week is our GO LIVE week with the new software at work. WISH US LUCK! It has been a LOOOOONG 2 1/2 years. I know I would never recommend this company to ANYONE. My account rep is a nice guy but he works for a crappy company. They purposely tell you anything special they have to customize at a price. You can't do your own programming, blah blah blah. They tell you that so you have to PAY them for EVERYTHING! And I mean everything!!!!

Fourth of July is this coming weekend too. I love the 4th. This year we are yet again driving a truck through the parade hauling a float for either the Elks club or the Girl Scouts. It's alot of fun. Plus Dustin's boss pays him well and he's salary so it only feels right that we do this for him on the 4th. Fireworks won't be the same though without Jamie. It was always Amanda, Jamie, and myself at the fireworks. This year just won't be the same. Miss ya girl!

Getting baby fever...

Dustin that is not me! lol. Last weekend we headed down to gettysburgh to see adam and kelly and the twins. They were born 4 months ago and this was our first free weekend since they've been born. And wow, let me tell you, I give 100% credit to any family with twins. It's not an easy job, but they are doing great with it!!! And you can tell they are in love with their children, no matter how hard it gets. This was a blessing to them since Adam had stem cell a few years ago and didn't know if the invitro would take. The are beautiful kids! I will have baby fever some day...just not today! :)


Proud parents, Dustin, and changing time!


Lane watching TV!Aleah ready to go!
Dustin playing with Lane

Spinning Class

So I started spinning classes about 2 months ago. I thought I'd NEVER make it through one and now I go about 2 nights a week for 45 mins and man do I sweat!!! I love them because of that and I hate them because of it. I went tonight and he really kicked our asses. But...that's ok, that's what a GROUP EXERCISE CLASS is for, right? I haven't noticed any weight loss because of it, but I've gotten a lot toner from it. Which is better than nothing. I just like the way I feel when I actually accomplish a class.

Awwww Spring!

Spring is FINALLY here after a very long winter. Last weekend was like summer, I thought we'd skipped spring which would be very disappointing since I love spring. Dustin was mowing last night and he had Buddy out with him. I couldn't find buddy following the mower anymore so I went out back to see what he was doing and low and behold this is what I found.
Apparently this was a mouse or something in the gutter and he ripped it off the side of the house to get it. I did take it away from him once I got the pictures and told him NO, but that was after the picture and hard to do with a straight face!!!! I'll never survive kid stuff if I can't survive dog stuff. After watching "Marley and Me" last night, I realized if this is the WORST he does, he really is a good dog!!! :)

Grouchy Crappy Day

I hate mondays. But I hate stupid people even more. I have a coworker who never shows up, hardly ever does their job but had the nerve to imply to me that i should have been in the office more last week. Oh I'm sorry, my family member had surgery and I had to spend a day with customer's per my BOSS! ARGH!!! One girl asked me if I needed some m&m's and I said no, because the other person would be picking them out of their forehead when I was done!!!!

Ok...so that was at 10:0o this morning. I was all downhill after that! I did however get most of my work done for the current day. So that was one plus. I just have a few things left to finish up from last week and should be done as well.

I went to the grocery store today after work, probably not a good idea in a bad mood, but I did it because hey, my husband has to eat. There was a woman that was aisle following me. You know the person you almost walk in next to and you end up following them through the entire store. She had her 3 kids with her. 2 of which were very young. Apparently the oldest child wanted goldfish so she bought them. AND PUT THEM IN THE CART WITH THE 2 SMALL CHILDREN. For about 4 aisles I could hear here yelling at the smaller children to put them down and leave them alone. By the time I got to the cereal aisle, the kids had FREED WILLY! Goldfish on the floor from the ripped open bag. I learned today, you get the goldfish when you are DONE shoppping, not when you walk in the door. It did make me smile though I know when I have kids, I won't be smiling as much! :)

Back in the Groove, if you want to call it that.

What a whirlwind week!!! We got home from Vacation on Saturday. Started back to work Monday. Worked Monday and tuesday. Wednesday went to Buffalo for work with the bosses for a customer lunch then a performance meeting with one of the terminals. Got home around 7:30. Had to be up at 5:00 the next morning to take dad to the hospital for what was supposed to be a one day quick surgery. 45 min surgery, eat, drink, pee, you go home. I SHOULD have been home by 4:00 that afternoon. But dad had an allergic reaction to the anesthesia and passed out right in front of me while talking to me. I mean eyes rolled back, and passed out. Scared the beejeebees out of me. Then he came to and threw up! So the Dr. kept him over night. My dad wasn't real impressed with that, but he didn't complain too much. So I had to take 1/2 day friday off and go get him in the morning. He was to be discharged around 7:30 and expect 2 hours for discharge papers. We left at 11:15 for home. Finally made it to work around 1:00 or so and worked until 5;30 trying to get caught up. Then worked yesterday and went to a 3 year olds birthday party. I am POOPED!!!! I slept until 9:30 this morning, something I never do!!! It's a good thing I went on vacation or I'd need one after this week!

Here's a few pics from vacation. We didn't take alot, but we took some!

Babies, Babies, everywhere!!!!

I feel like I'm stuck in baby land. Our very good friends gave birth to their twins TODAY!!! Leah and Lane are doing well. Lane is at another hospital though because his lungs weren't fully developed and they are taking it as a precaution. This is an awesome thing for these two because they weren't sure they'd have a baby since he had cancer and the had frozen some of his swimmers before his stem cell. But they ended up with TWINS!!! Welcome Leah and Lane!!!!

Also, my brother has announced this girlfriend is expecting in August. YIKES!!! My brother's main goal in life is to have a child, so he is very excited. I just wish they would've waited until they were a little more financially stable since she already has one of her own who lives full time with them.

And then..out of the last 4 weddings I've attended....3 of those couples are expecting. The only couple that isn't expecting is in the 50's so that's understandable!!!! lol.

I feel babied out right now, but still nothing thinking it's our turn just yet! :)

History

It's weird as I watched TV last night to see that Obama's Inauguration is considered "historic" in 2009 for a 1/2 black man to be president. But oh well, the times are the times. I just hope that he is all he's promised. I realize the economy is going to get worse before it gets better, but he's made alot of promises and I hope he's up for the challenge that awaits him.

This is definitely an interesting time for me to be the age that I am. I work in an industry that literally if you don't like what's going on today, wait until tomorrow. I live in a world were teenagers have to have laptops, cellphones, $300 ipods, brand new cars, and $100 jeans. I work 40 hours a week and we live comfortably and I STILL don't own $100 jeans. OH MY GOD, I'm officially old and sounded like my mother there.

The future does scare me, it scares me about our jobs, our livelyhood, and our security. But I cannot live everyday worrying about what tomorrow may (or may not) bring and just hope for the best each day. And know there is no money in the world that is going to change the fact that I love my husband and my family very much. Nothing can take that away.

I am very proud to be an american, today, and everyday! Pride is not something you feel one day and not another.

Colder than a witches ...

well you know the rest. lol. What a crazy freaking week of weather. I haven't not seen it below zero on the legion clock in town since I was in high school. It was -1 friday and -6 Saturday. Saturday morning it was -20 at my house at 6:30 a.m. Freaking nuts!!!!!

We are getting warmer weather though and with that warmer weather brings SNOW and lots of it. Dustin and I went to Erie last night and wowza it was a rough ride home. It wasn't even snowing when we left but by the time we headed home it was a blizzard. Took us a very long time to get home.

Spent most of today sanding and mudding drywall in the kitchen. Ok...umm those people that do this for a living or enjoy renovating houses are just plain freaking nuts. It took all day for a 4x12 wall. I need to be able to look at something and get some satisfaction after a days work, this is not my idea of satisfaction! lol.

2009 new year, new you!

Well it's 2009. Ok so it's 10 days into 2009 and I'm just now blogging but that's ok. It's been a busy month. We finally closed on the house. We moved in the weekend after Christmas. Things are starting to finally come together. We have learned several things owning a house. One is Dustin is not as Bob Vila capable as my dad is. But he tries. And for that I am grateful.

2009 Resolutions/Commitments
With the new year comes resolutions. I try not to aim too high, in case of disappointment. But this year I would love to lose some weight. Heck, I'm not shooting for 20 lbs or anything, just for my "fat" jeans to be my "fat" jeans again instead of my everyday jeans.

I want to make my job, just that, my job and not my life. I feel like sometimes my whole life revolves around those 18 wheelers and the routes they consume.

I want to have more "me" time.

With 2008 I lost a very close and dear friend of mine. I miss her terribly each day, but I know that her memory lives on through the people she has changed and made a difference in their lives. In 2009 I want to make sure that I am there for her sister, my good friend too, when she needs me. I want to be there for her in the bad times, and celebrate with her in the good times. And of course, help her show Elianna what a great mommy she had by living on with her memory. If it's one thing I learned this past year, live life for all it is. Live life for TODAY.

Ok This is just NUTS!!

It's November 20th and look at this!!! I drove home in this. This is my car in my parking space at my house. Note the snow packed on the tires and wheels!!!!

Winter is here

Winter is here with a vengeance for only being the middle of november. Minus the cold toes and the cold hands, I don't mind winter. I love it when we get a big storm on a sunday where I can just sit in my house and watch it snow. I don't love it as much when I have to drive to work in it. Unlike some parts of the country, getting a foot of snow is just another day of work for us used to this stuff. I do however love it when I drive into work and everything is pure white and untouched. It seems almost like a christmas card. It so weird that something that is such a normal part of life for me, some people have never experienced. I can't imagine a winter without any snow. I almost think it would be depressing. Not having to put on boots, coats, gloves, and starting my car 10 mins before I leave wouldn't be so bad, but I do think I'd miss the snow.

DVR

Let me just tell you, the best d@mn investment there is currently out there. I love it. I can set it to record any show I want and it will record it every time it's on. Plus it is was our only savior during the election on Tuesday. We watched all the shows we missed last week. Plus with us trying to get to bed a little earlier we can record our shows we'd normally watch at 10 when we are now in slumber land.

Happy Halloween.

I've never been a huge fan of halloween. Actually it scared the bejeeebies out of me. I can remember as a kid my dad would take me out trick or treating and my mom would stay home. My dad knew I hated trick or treating and so we'd go up our street and down the next street that my aunt lived on. We'd hang out at her house all night and then she'd give me her left over candy and that way mom never knew!!!! lol.

Here's a picture of my brother and I carving our pumpkins when we were kids. That was my most favorite part of halloween!!!!

Faith and Love

Lately I've had alot of faith and love for a good friend of mine. Unfortunatley early this morning she lost her battle and she went to be with the lord. I know god really needed a good teacher up there and that's why he took her but it's still very very hard to swallow. She was one of my best friends and she died for something she always wanted...a child. She was the most selfless person I knew, other than her sister. I hope her family, husband, and daughter can have peace in the future and celebrate the life she had here on earth. I know she touched so many lives and she will be missed tremendously.

Jamie - you will be missed!

Exhausted

Emotionally and physically. Today was the 13th day in a row I had to go into work. Between all that has gone on this week I'm a stressed out exhausted mess. My bathroom issues have kicked back into full force from my nerves and tomorrow will be my "me" day. I have no plans except tomorrow evening I need to go to the funeral home to support Jason during his mom's viewing. Poor kid. I can't imagine what he's going through. It must be tough.

This coming week we sign out papers for our mortgage. I still can't believe we bought a house! We close Dec 8th. we have alot of work to do once we move in but that can keep us busy.

Thank god for little miracles.

This week has been a bit of an emotional rollercoaster for me. Yesterday we counter offered on a house we were looking at and they accepted. This is GREAT news. No more castle on wheels, no more shoebox, and I will have an attached 2 car garage.

However...it was very hard to celebrate. A very very good friend of mine delivered a healthy baby girl Tuesday but mommy had some serious complications. We lost her once and she fought to come back. She is one tough little cookie. She is in a very good hospital in pittsburgh now but she still needs lots of good thoughts and prayers. She has a long road ahead of her. And her baby needs her mommy!!!

Also yesterday another good friend's mother lost her battle with cancer. She had only been diagnosed 1 month ago and she lost her struggle last night. My heart goes out to my friend and his father and his son.

So this week has been bittersweet for us. It makes you think what's important in life. That's your friends and your family. The little things you take for granted could come and go before you know it.

One Year

Our one year anniversary is tomorrow. It's so hard to believe we've been married a year. It's been a good year though. Not too many obstacles to overcome. We did get a dog and realize that we can take care of him. So, we are somewhat confident that someday we could have a child. ha ha!

My mom I think is expecting kids soon. She bought us John Deere baby socks for an anniversary gift. YIKES!!! She's got a way to go before I'll need those.

Rain Rain and more Rain is what this month has seemed like. Not only did we lose corn this week but everything is flooded. It just keeps raining and storming. Almost a storm a day. It's getting a little scary!

Summer is almost over. It's hard to believe. We have 4 weekends before Labor Day and all but one of those is full with stuff to do. CRAZY to think soon it will be SNOWING!

I'm old!

Well not THAT old but I feel old. Monday was my 28th birthday. We actually went out of town for the weekend and took Monday and Tuesday off of work. It was nice to get away. We went to Amish country and shopped around the shops and the outlet malls. It was alot of fun. But it was also nice to get back.

Tuesday evening we got a horrible storm here at the house. I was seriously afraid. We woke up to find 100 acres or more of corn on the ground from the wind and/or damaged from hail. All 100 acres are a total loss and we lost about 4 huge trees and one huge limb fell on the rental house. But the good thing is everyone is ok.

I am a little bummed lately and seriously considering changing my career. I keep getting told I am a great asset to the company and that I am a hard worker, but I now have a 2nd employee in the past year that I have to train to make more money than me and move further up the company than I am. I know life isn't fair, but give me a break. It's like the better you do, the less chance you have for move to another job. I am seriously considering a career path change. Not sure what right now, but I am going to meet with an advisor soon about getting my certification to teach business and IT computers in the secondary level.

So happy (but still not quite having baby fever!)

We talked to Dustin's friends wife yesterday and they are pregnant with twins. I am so excited for them. Her husband is a great friend of Dustin's he met in college and he had a form of lymphoma a few years ago and had to go through stem cell and chemo and radiation. He's been a year and a half cancer free. However, even though they froze some of his swimmers, there weren't enough to take. So they went to a fertility clinic and chose a donor. She called yesterday pregnant with twins! We are both so overjoyed for them and can't wait until we have a free weekend to go and visit them. These are two people who we know will be great parents!

This has been one crazy week. Thursday Dustin's company had a truck rollover from another crazy driver that was infront of Dustin's driver. It's not bad enough Dustin's dad had that truck accident in the spring where that car crossed into his lane, now we have another stupid driver who's car had no turn signals or break lights. Thankfully with this accident, everyone is ok. He spent all night Thursday night at the scene trying to clean up. Unfortunately his driver had some extremely large steel products on his trailer and they had to call in a crane company from WV to lift them out of the ditch. The good thing though is that trucks can be replaced, trailers can be replaced, people can't!!!

Golf

Well we are trying a new hobby. Dustin used to golf when he was in highschool and I have only ever done mini golf or the driving range. I have a company golf outing sunday and it's at a low key golf course so we went and got a cheap set of clubs for me for it (Dustin insisted I had my own clubs so we can go whenever we want now). Last night we decided to go for 9 holes at a local course that is very laid back. I mean there are busch light cans in the garbages, you can tell it's not a classy joint but that suits me just fine. I am not impressed with the country club types and rules. I did ok, I can hit it straight but just not far. lol. We also walked all 9 holes with our clubs on our backs. Wowza, now that is a workout. Anyone who says it's not, hasn't done it or is in superman shape. So we'll see how this weekends tournament goes. It was nice to just go and hit out some frustration and it only costed us $12 total for the 2 of us. Then we went out to eat afterwards. It was nice to just get out!

Rain and More Rain!

Rain and more rain. I shouldn't complain, we are not near as bad as Iowa and I am thankful for that. Today my mom and i went shopping an hour or so away and got stuck in a horrible storm on the way home. I have never driven in water that bad before. There is a good thing about living out here, we don't get the floods, storms, hail, or tornados most other places do. But I seriously was scared today.

On a good note, I did find 2 cute pairs of pants shopping. It sucks shopping anymore with the weight I've gained but I need work pants so I had to break down and buy pants. Hopefully I will be buying NEW smaller pants shortly down the road.

I can't belive it's almost the 4th of July. Time flies so fast anymore. I can remember being little and summer seemed to last forever!!! Now it no more starts and it's over again!

One week of Calorie Counting

And I've almost got it! lol. I started portion control big time and no major snacks between meals. It's amazing how much better I feel and how much energy I have again. I passed up Grasshopper Cake AND peanut butter pie this week. Now that's willpower! I LOVE PEANUT BUTTER PIE! But it was made with reduced everything and if I'm gonna splurge it's gonna be ona real good piece, not a reduced wanna be. lol.

I also started walking my road again. I am still very cautious since Yogi Bear lives around here now and let me tell you he's freaking huge! I can fit my foot in his paw print, no freaking joke! And the bastard ate all my pumpkin plants, squash and zucchini plants we had planted up on the hill. Didn't touch my real garden. Really pissed me off too, I was looking sooo forward to my pumpkins. :( Dustin told me I'd have pumpkins out my kazoo and I was so excited to give them away to little kids I know and stuff. Now I'll have to buy my pumpkins again in the fall. Such a bummer. Couldn't eat the peapods I don't want could he. Yogi and I are going to have words if he keeps this crap up! :)

Why I never found a job in IT?

Because deep down I hate it! Not just dislike it, I HATE IT! I am in the middle of implementing new software at work. We were supposed to go live January 1st. Well it's almost July 1st and we are looking at LATE FALL. Today I spent 2 hours in a live meeting with this company figuring out one small minor problem. Yup, I small stupid problem. This is going to be an extremely long process.

I went to the Dr. last week and had bloodwork done to see if there is a reason why I am SO tired. I haven't heard back yet, I'll wait until Thursday to call them and see what it says. There's got to be SOME reason. She wants me to try YOGA too. Well that should be interesting. I'm not flexible nor am I coordinated enough to do yoga. But if it relieves the everyday stress from work, I am all for it!!!!

This weekend I have off. I am so excited to have a weekend off, especially since everyone else gets a 3 day weekend over the 4th and I have to work that saturday. Bah humbug! I need a bankers job! Most days I like my job, but it's the things like the holiday weekends you never really get that is making me rethink my career path at this company. Every other Saturday and having to be there from 7:00 until 2:00 is not really something I want when I have kids. A one day weekend doesn't really cut it when you have a family.

The Three H's

Hazy, Hot, and Humid. Something we see late July early August around here and it's 90 degrees on the 8th of June. UNREAL!!!! 3 weeks ago today it was SNOWING. It's just crazy.

10 years ago I graduated high school this weekend. Wow, I feel old. lol. It's just weird to look back at the past 10 years in all that I've gone through, done, and accomplished. I guess I do have something to be proud of. My reunion is in July, and I don't think we'll be going. Just not something I am interested in attending.

I feel like crap lately for the past week. Tired all the time, headaches, crabby, it's like I have PMS 3 weeks early. If it doesn't go away this week I'm going to see about getting my iron checked and some other blood work. Something just doesn't feel right.

We didn't get the house up for sherriff sale. It went double what we wanted to pay for it, and frankly we are ok with that for now. We'll figure something out.

Mentally DRAINED!

It's only Monday and I am already drained mentally. I have several projects going on at work plus I am the ONLY one that knows the new computer system so it's my job to train everyone else plus get my regular work done. The software company will be here next week to fix any last minute problems and I have no time to work on everything. It just seems the more the days push on, the further behind I get. And I'm not a slow worker either. It just bugs me that I work with certain people that do nothing 8 hours a day and get paid for it, and then I bust my a$$ and get nowhere for it. It was soooo nice to have 2 days off this weekend and not have to worry about anything except my husband and my dog. I need more full weekends!!!!

On another note, we decided we are going to bid on a house up for sherriff sale. The open bidding is Thursday morning, so we should know by lunch time if we got it or not. We did go look at another house this weekend but it was just horrible. Structurally it's great but cosmetically it's going to take alot of money. And it reeks of cat pee! Now tell me, if I wanted top dollar for house in this county and in this economy, would I put a house up for sale that reeks of cat pee and stains everywhere. I opened the 3/4 bath door off the laundry area and about puked it stunk so bad. It was like they mopped up the cats messes but didn't clean out the mop or the bucket. BLECH!!!!! If the sherrif sale doesn't work out, we are still trailer bound for a little while longer. I'd love to build, but frankly in this economy, who the heck wants to chance it!!!

Day 3 back on weight watchers and I am STARVING!!!! I am only allowed 21 points a day and let me tell you, it's not easy. I am starving all the time! I need to find me some low point high fiber filling snacks.

What makes me smile today!

Someone's blog had this on it today and it inspired me.

1. the sun and 70 degree weather
2. my husband and my dog playing in the yard
3. fresh produce in my cereal
4. a good book
5. HGTV
6. The fact that my laundry is done and my house is clean on a sunday morning.
7. My flowers I planted this past week and that *I* planted them (i'm not the domesticated sort)
8. Watching my brother play with his girlfriends 2 year old. He will be a great father someday.
9. As of right now, both our families are drama free.
10. I life in a neighborhood where everyone beeps and waves when they drive by and an I can leave my keys in my car and not lock my house (this day and age, that's something to smile about!)

2 weeks a year

2 weeks a year....I don't see my husband at all. One week in the spring and one week in the fall. That's when he's working at the farm. Thankfully, the farm is only a crop farm. So he plants corn and then he harvests corn. He LIVES for it, and he LOVES it. This year I have been especially worried since he found out he has bronchitis last thursday and has yet to slow down. But as of 9:00 tonight, he is done for the year. And our life will resume to normal until fall when the corn is taller than me. I don't really mind it, thankfully I am one of those people than can be alone for a day or two and it doesn't really bother me. I can find enough things to keep me busy. My dog on the other hand, he is Dustin's dog and he whined and cried for a whole week because he didn't get to go too!!!!

Funny thing today I found out as well. There's a saying out there about good things come to those who wait and bad things come to those who treat people like crap. Ok, well that's not exactly the saying, but you get what I mean. I worked for a company a few years back that was very unbearable to work for and simply thought that they were invincible and people had to come to their business. Well...today I found out...their establishment is CLOSED! A little part of me, the part of me that has the horns and the pitchfork, are secretly smiliing. Smiling because finally it's realized that you really cannot treat people like crap all the time and expect your life to be perfect. Sooner or later, it will get you!

My new hobby room.

I have spend the past week or so cleaning out the computer room (which is about the size of walk in closet) and making a little scrappy room in the spare bedroom. All that we use the spare bedroom for is when we have overnight guests, which has been once all year, and to store stuff.

Here's the before.And here's the after:

It's not completely done yet, but it works for now. I do need a chair though don't I?!?

Beauty Mark or Mole

Whatever it is, I don't like it. I have one on my face close to my nose I've had for years. Probably since I was born. It bugs me. Plus I worry because it's on my face and with the sun, could it turn into skin cancer? So yesterday I went to the good old Dermatologist to get an opinion. I can have it removed, and it would have to be plastic surgery and the insurance probably won't cover it unless their is reason to believe it's cancerous or precancerous. Or I can leave it alone. I still haven't decided what I am going to do. I'm going to think about it and maybe persue it later. My mom thinks it's my "personality" and can't imagine me without it. I think it's ugly and will be super embarrassed if it starts growing hair. lol.

One good thing though, I got some prescrips for my face acne that he said will work much better than what I am currently using. Woohoo!

Electrifying Monday!

What a Manic Monday. From the time I got to work until the time I left my phone rang non-stop, emails popped up, and people came over looking for answers to problems. Mondays are the worst in my job. I didn't even take a lunch break, but I did eat my 0 pt. progresso soup. lol.

Then about 3:00 p.m. (my coworker and myself are on the same power unit and battery backup) our electic lines to our computers SHORTED OUT! I smelled something burning and then all of a sudden the lights flickered and our computers went black. It was freaky!!! Thankfully maintenance came over to fix it, they weren't done by the time I left but they said they would be by tomorrow. THANK GOD!!!!

Tomorrow should be a better day. I only have to work 1/2 day because I have a dermatologist appointment about an hour away so I get to leave at 11:30 then I am treating myself to a little Kohl's shopping trip since I'll be there anyways. ;)

Sooo Excited!!!

I found out this week one of my good friends is pregnant. She has been married 2 years and her husband just wasn't "ready" until now. She's due in October and she had a little bit of problem in the beginning but all is well now. I am so happy for her.

Which leads me to the question everyone has asked me in the past couple weeks seeing most of our family at the funeral and phone calls about Dustin's dads accident...When is it YOUR turn. I keep telling everyone I am on the 30 year plan. lol. I am going to be 28 in July so at 30 we'll probably start trying. Right now I want to make sure I have a house big enough for the 2 of us, a baby and the dog. And this little trailer just isn't cutting it. We were going to start the blueprints this summer for our house and have it built next year but with the housing market as crappy as it is, we are waiting a while to see how the economy is. That may sound risky now, but we really have no reason not to wait it out.

Other than me HATING this shoebox. lol!

Day 1 Back to Weight Watchers

Well today was Day 1 back to weight watchers. So far, not too bad for just getting back. Slow but sure. I'm hoping that the support from the girls at the dawg will give me the motivationt to keep it up. I also worked out again today. :) That's a good thing too. That's the hardest thing for me to do. But with the time change, getting out at 5:30 and not getting home until 6:00 makes it alot easier to keep motivated when it's daylight out.

Ok...my total points I'm allowed for the day is 22. Plus 30 flex points for the week. So far I am at 25 points for the day. I know that's a little high, but it's not horrible for being the first day back.

I am hoping I can do this. I'm sick of feeling like this!

An Easter Gift from my best friend.

My friend just stopped by with an easter gift for me. And my husband WILL kill her when he see's her next.Ha ha! but I think it will look fabulous on my black car! lol

Spring = Mud

And lots of it. This is our driveway a few days ago when we first got the load of gravel for the driveway. I knew it would get muddy this spring, but not like this. Poor Dustin is out on the loader with his snowpants, carhart jacket, and gloves as it's about 32 degrees and freezing rain.

And my dog testing out the new gravel this morning. It still needs ALOT of work. I have a feeling yard work is going to be our only work this summer. :(
And for Amy (Gebmom) a pic of our house.

Spring Cleaning

Spring is far from here, even though the calendar says it's 25 days away. but today is my spring cleaning day for some of the rooms. Partially because we have company coming in a few weeks and you can't even open the door to the spare bedroom. There's just something about spring cleaning that gets me in the groove of things. Soon it will be time to plant flowers, mow the lawn, and break out the sunglasses for more than just the sun's glare off the snow! I can't wait! And today is the start of my cleaning expedition!

Sunday Snowday

Today I'm pretty much snowed in. It's cold, it's windy, it's snowy and frankly where I live, it's not worth driving anywhere. We don't get snow days up here. The roads never close for snow and I always have to report to work, regardless of the weather. So for me Sunday Snowdays are the best! They are the days I spend in my jammies and I don't shower until almost dinner time. I watch my favorite chick flicks. I can scrapbook and not clean my stuff up. I can read forever if I want to. It also seems the days when I am the most productive is on those "sunday snowdays"

Ahh Country Living!

So this morning I found myself running down my icey driveway in my pajama pants, a hoodie, my husbands shoes and my hot rollers in my hair screaming to the top of my lungs. Why do you ask? My dog thought it would be fun to chase the damn amish buggy that was going past our house. I'm sure the amish found me very funny looking. I know my husband was laughing hysterically in the door way. My dog, let's just say, he's on my shit list today.

And that was just the start of my oh so wonderful monday.

10 Years!

Wow...It's hard to believe I've been out of school for 10 years this June. Someone I graduated mentioned it to me today and I can't hardly believe it's been 10 years. Looking back it's amazing how far I have come, and how much further I have to grow.

I went from a very shy 17 year old who pretty much just studied and worked and worried about what other's thought of me to a 27 year old married career-driven women. I've graduated college with a 4 year degree, met some great friends along the way, met and married a great guy, built an awesome restaurant then left it all behind for greener pastures, been through family hardships and surgerys, lost a good friend in car accident, and learned to trust people along the way.

Here's to many many more!!!!!

The difference a week makes.

Today we finally have snow in January. Imagine that, snow in January in NW Pennsylvania.

Here's what it looked like last week.
And here is a picture from the same position (my front porch) this morning.
It's amazing what a difference a week makes!

my "bucket list"

Things I want to do before I kick the bucket!


1. Build a house, and i mean really build it, no kit home.
2. Have children and be healthy enough to see their children.
3. Go on an Alaskan Cruise (I am strange I know)
4. Get my MBA (sometime)

The hardest thing I've had to do this week.

I would say the hardest thing this week has been not letting my job get me down. I had a major slap in the face last week when an uneducated individual who has been in my department 4 months was promoted to a job I was more qualified for, the reasoning I was told was that I am too good in my current position. I felt that was a cop out reason. I was hurt but I've learned that age old lesson, life isn't fair, just get over it and keep on trucking.

2007 In Review

So...2007 is almost gone so I thought I'd think back to the past year.

New house, new husband, new dog.
The year of new stuff.

Finally decided to buy a trailer and live in it until we can afford to build "comfortably" without strapping us of our finances. It was hard moving out of living with my brother, i've lived with him for 26 years!!!

Marriage...after 5 years we finally got hitched. Great wedding, awesome honeymoon, and realized we really have a bunch of people that care alot about us.

My life as a mommy...a doggie mommy that is. Buddy joined our humble household in the fall. We luff him! He's such a fun addition to our little family.

Supervisor...got promoted the first of the year at work. Got a great pay raise with it. ;) Then I went from supervisor to taking upon another person's entire job as well. It's been a stressful year at work, but it's a job I truely do enjoy. (saturday working aside).

Goals for the new year:
Be healthier, be happier, and look more to the good.
The other goal...BE MORE ORGANIZED. I guess I need to clean my house/desk first for this to happen but I am going to try very hard to be more organized.


Cheers to a great 2007 and hopefully an even better 2008!

2 More Days

It's 2 days until christmas and surprisingly I'm pretty much done. Granted I'm not cooking dinner and I didn't make hardly any cookies or treats but that's alright. That's what the mom's are for. This will be our first Christmas as husband and wife, which is a little strange. It's hard to believe we've been married almost 5 months now! But I am thankful that we have what we have and have made it this far.

Scary Day

Yesterday was a very scary day for me. My mom called me in the morning to tell me she was going to the Dr. because she had a pain in her stomach. I told her to call me when she got done. She called me about 11:30 a.m. to tell me she was in the ER they thought she had a kink in her intestine. So I flew down to the hospital and sat with her through all the tests and etc. We laughed and joked and watched lifetime in the ER while they took forever. Finally we found out the Dr's office was wrong, it was actually GERD in her GI system that caused the severe pain. I could've killed the woman at the dr's office that told my mom she'd probably need surgery. Mom was all worried because I missed my office christmas party to sit in the ER with her. But she's my mom and I would've stayed all night with her if I had to. Dustin and I talked last night about how the roles have really changed, it's not longer our parents taking care of us, it's us taking care of our parents. *sigh* Getting old really does suck! lol.

Annual Fall Weekend Getaway

This weekend was our annual fall getaway. We always go to Gettysburg in October to visit friends of ours that live there. Dustin went to college with Adam and his wife Kelly. We only see each other a few times a year but they are "true" friends.

This weekend 2 other couples went with us, as it was a surprise birthday for Adam at their house on Saturday. Saturday mornin the guys went farm touring (rolleyes) and the girls went to hagerstown to the outlets shopping. It was alot of fun! Then we came back and started cooking. Such good food and good drinks! And he was totally surprised with his John Deere tractor cake and the collector pedal tractor we bought him.

It's so nice to get out of town for a weekend and just relax. We had a great time! I can't wait until we do it again!

Our New Ride

Dustin decided that we needed a new "toy" A friend of his was selling his ATV, so we decided to buy it. We sold dustin's old sport atv to his brother and we bought a grandpa atv with 4 wheel drive and reverse. It's an automatic too, so no shifting. I wasn't sure I'd use it, but since we've had it, I've used it to go to his parents and take my garbage down. And it's a nice mailbox getter! lol!

Here's the new toy!